#260

I came home from work today to find the apartment empty. Which was weird because Shorty was supposed to be home since she’s still on confinement. I walk into my bedroom and then I suddenly hear a snicker behind me. I turn around to see this.

Me: Ohh can walk around already after your surgery, now can start playing this stupid game again huh this Shorty?

Shorty: HEHEHEHEHE

#261

I walk into our bedroom and see Shorty with a bin on her dresser, cutting her hair.

Me: What are you doing???

Shorty: Cutting my hair.

Me: Why don’t you just go to a salon and cut it??

Shorty: I can’t… have to wait two more weeks till confinement is over. And I can’t stand this fringe, keeps blocking my eyes.

Me: If you cut wrong you’re just going to have to….

Shorty: *cuts* AUUUGHHHH!!!!

Me: I guess you’re going to have to see Hiki (her stylist) now.

#262

5 minutes later, Shorty is standing talking to me somewhere in the room away from the bin. I see her cut her hair and flick it off on to the ground.

Me: Did you just cut your hair and flick it on to the ground?

Shorty: HEHEHEH

Me: What do you think your hair is going to do? Crawl itself into the bin?

Shorty: HEHEHE

#257

While in the hospital, a few days after Fighter was born.

Shorty: I feel like a cow.

Me: Why?

Shorty: All I do now is sit around and pump milk for Fighter. And then they feed me. Then I sleep, then I pump milk again.

Me: Well you’re doing a great job. Look at all the milk you’re pumping.

Shorty: *looks at milk volume* WOW… a lot huh…

Me: Wahh…. top performer now huh this Dutch Lady. I mean Dutch Shorty.

#258

Shorty: You know I noticed that Fighter doesn’t have double eyelids. I thought that was weird because both of us have double eyelids, so why wouldn’t Fighter have.

Me: Uh huh…

Shorty: Then I was talking to your sister, and she was saying that your double eyelids are not natural. That when you went for your eye surgery when you were a kid, the Doctor just did something additional for you and gave you double eyelids. Is that true?

Me: Uhh….. hmm…

Shorty: well?

Me: Well… uh huh.

Shorty: “uh huh” means what? Means YES?

Me: Yeah.

Shorty: OHHHH…. misrepresentation huh this Fatty. I should sue.  I always thought your double eyelids were natural! Never tell me that they were the result of surgery huh?

Me: Uhh I didn’t think it would matter. You didn’t marry me for my eyelids did you?

Shorty: So…. this Fatty had “some work done” on himself huh. Even I haven’t had any work done yet.

Me: Hey I was 3 years old.

#259

Shorty is reading a book about Disney secrets.

Me: So how’s the book going?

Shorty: It’s ok I guess. It was more interesting earlier because it covered some secrets about the movies we know about. But now they’re talking about Disney movies nobody has heard about.

Me: Disney movies that nobody has heard about? IMPOSSIBLE!

Shorty: Really! You don’t believe me? I’ll show you.

Me: *waits while Shorty flips open her book*

Shorty: Okay… Lieutenant Robin Crusoe.

Me: Oh yeah I know that one.

Shorty: Toby Tyler.

Me: Yep know that one too *lies*

Shorty: Don’t bluff. Fine… tell me what it’s about!

Me: Uhh… it’s about a boy.

Shorty: Then?

Me: A boy who grew up in a farm.

Shorty: *flips book with bewildered eyes* WOW you’re right. He does grow up in a farm. But he leaves to join the circus.

Me: I know that.

Shorty: Sure you do.

Me: And he talks to animals.

Shorty: No he doesn’t.

Me: Yes he does.

Shorty: He has a pet chimpanzee but no he does not talk to animals.

Me: Ahh dammit… should’ve guessed that there would be a monkey in there somewhere.

Shorty: But you got the farm part right. How did you guess the farm part?

Me: Guess?

Shorty: Yes GUESS.

Me: I KNEW. I watched it before.

Shorty: Shit you lah! Say properly.

#253

Our neonatalogist (specialist for premature babies) had just left the room after telling us problems that premature babies could face because some things happen at the end of the pregnancy whereas Fighter is only at 31 weeks. For example, most of the antibodies from Shorty haven’t been transferred to Fighter yet because normally that happens at the end. After the Doctor left the room, Shorty started crying.

Me: What’s wrong?

Shorty: *continues crying*

Me: Why you crying?

Shorty: So many things happen only at the end of the pregnancy. If only I could have given him more time.

Me: What are you talking about? You bought him 3 weeks! You found out about Preeclampsia at 28 weeks and managed to hold on till 31 weeks. Now it’s just his turn to fight.

#254

The next morning Shorty was in a better mood. She messaged me just as I was about to leave the house for the hospital to see her.

Later that day…

Me: You know someone told me that once she had a son, the son was the priority and she focused less on the husband.

Shorty: Is it? HAHAHA

Me: So I see… this is how it’s going to be eh Fighter?

Shorty: HAHA noo… I still will sayang you *rubs my head*

Me: Hmmmm

Shorty: *still rubbing my head* This Fatty got such a big head huh…

#255

We were thinking of a Chinese name for Fighter.

Me: I was thinking we settle on Tiah Kean Li.

Shorty: HAR? Cannot ah… it’s like that video… “KEN LEEEEEEEEEE….. tou li bou di without yuuu”. He’ll be made fun of so much in school.

Me: HAhaha please la. By the time he goes to school everyone would have forgotten about that video.

#256

Last night was an emotional moment for us. While spending time with Fighter in the intensive care unit, the nurse suggested that we take Fighter out and have Shorty carry him.

She said it’s good for the baby, something we can read online called “Kangaroo Care”. That Fighter will feel comfortable in the arms of the mother, feeling her heart beat and listening to her voice.

When Shorty was holding Fighter in her arms she started crying. After we went back to her room…

Me: Why did you cry just now?

Shorty: *sigh* I don’t know… I just feel… like it’s just so much to handle. I just want to get well and go home and bring my baby boy home with me.

Me: I know but we’re doing so well now. To be honest, if all this turns out okay and Fighter comes out healthy, I wouldn’t have wanted this to have turned out any other way.  I think this experience has done wonders for our relationship and it would help us appreciate Fighter more. I can imagine… the next time Fighter wakes us up in the middle of the night with his crying, I don’t think I’ll feel annoyed. I’ll feel so relieved that he is strong enough to cry so loud.

Shorty: I know but I also feel sad because of how I look now. I look so ugly…. I used to be pretty. Now I can’t even post a picture of myself on my blog or Instagram. Like I’m not what my followers expect of me anymore.

Me: C’mon. This is just pregnancy. It’ll go back to normal soon. Besides, your most liked picture on Instagram and on Imotiv isn’t from one of your beautiful camwhoring pictures. It’s of the struggles you faced with your pregnancy and now with Fighter. People say you inspire them. Isn’t that wonderful? Knowing that you inspire people?

Shorty: I didn’t do anything also.

Me: Who said? You bought Fighter 3 more weeks!

Shorty: I didn’t have a choice and I just had to go along with it. Anyone else in my situation would have done the same.

Me: Not everyone. You were having high blood pressure to the extent of blurry vision, risk of stroke and risk of losing your eyesight. You had difficulty breathing, you threw up, you had constant headaches throughout the day and throughout this whole time you were stuck for weeks on a hospital bed. Anyone might be tempted to deliver Fighter earlier and get out of this situation. You on the other hand held on until your body couldn’t take it anymore.

Shorty: ….

Me: There’s one other thing.

Shorty: What?

Me: You know how we always joked about whether we would love each other if either one of us became fat?

Shorty: Ya…

Me: I now know that I would love you even if you were fat. 🙂

Shorty’s blood pressure has been going up quite a bit in the past 24 hours. Doctor has been increasing medication to try keep it down but we’re almost at the maximum dosage so it looks like we might have to be forced to deliver Fighter soon. She’s also a lot weaker, has a bit of pain here and there and finds it a bit difficult to breathe. We’re just counting the days now… I’m now only just hoping for Monday to come so Fighter will be 31 weeks.

In the mean time to pass the time I decided to post some of the other conversations we’ve had lately.

#250

This conversation took place last week when we were still allowed to go out of the hospital for a few hours. We were at Tokyo Street in Pavilion where I bought this watermelon ice-cream from Japan.

Shorty: FATTY come here. I think you’ll like this ice-cream.

Me: Ohhh how you know ah?

Shorty: Of course I know.. I’m your wife!  *sensitive*

Me: Oooh Mrs Sensitive.

Shorty: No its Mrs Tiah…. HAHAHA GEDDIT GEDDIT?

Me: No…

#251

I walk into Shorty’s room in the hospital

Me: Heheh just now I saw this cute baby from the next door ward being rolled out. Sleeping away.

Shorty: Yayayaya…. it’s the one always crying one. The one wrapped in the pink blanket right?

Me: I think so.

Shorty: The one that is really really red one right his face?

Me: Yah….. damn cute wan.

Shorty: Hahaha ya… it’s the one when you walk out of my room it’s from the ward on the left one right?

Me: Uhh no… from the right one.

Shorty: Oh….. then it’s another one.

Me: Yeah probably.

Shorty: ….. bitches all giving birth before me!!! *waves fist*

Me: Eh excuse me! Need I remind you that that is a good thing considering we’re here trying to delay Fighter’s birth so he has more time to grow in your womb.

Shorty: Ohh… hehehehe … yayaya…

#252 

In the past few days Shorty has been feeling really heavy from the pregnancy. Her stomach now is pretty huge in comparison to her small frame. She says that she feels she can’t support the weight.

Shorty: Ahh Fighter can’t wait for you to come out! Don’t think I can do this anymore.

Me: HEY! No Fighter… you stay in there… Mummy doesn’t mean that *speaks to stomach*

Shorty: Fighter… the world is so colourful outside. You should come out and see it!

Me: No Fighter! I mean yes… the world is colourful but you can see it in 4 weeks time. Be patient. Not just yet….. Notty huh this Shorty!

#246

In the first few days that Shorty was in the hospital, she decided to take her first walk outside her room and downstairs the lobby area of the hospital. I decided to accompany her while she walked out of her room past all the nurses all dressed in her hospital gown.

Shorty: *looks around nervously* Just taking a walk here….

Shorty: *takes a few more steps* Just taking a walk here….

Me: Haha this stupid girl.. keep repeating yourself because you feel guilty that you are walking around when the nurses tell you to rest is it?

Shorty: HEHEHE

#247

The next day we got Doctor’s permission to take Shorty out to a nearby shopping mall. She then dressed up in her normal clothes and walked out of her room. As she was walking out of the ward she saw another mother dressed in her hospital gown coming out of her room.

Shorty: HEHEH… SO LONG SUCKERS!!!

Me: You’re going to be coming back here in a few hours and putting on that hospital gown again Shorty.

Shorty: ….

Me: Face it you’ve been here longer than most of the other mothers. You’re like Citizen here already. and I’m PR.

#248

Shorty wanted to eat ramen so I brought her to a ramen place in Pavilion. 

Me: Come I take picture of you post on my Instagram.

Shorty: Dowan la I look so pale…

Me: No la come come…

Shorty: *poses*

Me: *snaps*… *uploads*

Shorty: *sees on her feed* HEY! Why you post this picture of me! I look so ugly here!

Me: Where got ugly!

Shorty: Got! Dowan to post anymore pictures of me online already!

Me: Okok fine… I go post an even uglier picture of myself ok?  *snaps picture and uploads*

Shorty: HAHAHA SO FUKIN UGLY!

Me: There you go… I bet Christy (a friend of ours) wouldn’t post such an ugly picture of herself on Instagram like that.

Shorty: Hahaha I think most pretty girls won’t post such an ugly picture of themselves on Instagram.

Two minutes later…

Me: OH SHIT OH SHIT… IN LIKE 2 MINUTES I GOT 160 LIKES ALREADY… SHIT SHIT… IF THIS UGLY PICTURE  SOMEHOW GOES TO POPULAR PAGE IMMA KEEL MYSELF.

*leaves comment on pic telling people not to like it*

Shorty: HAHAHAHAH

#249

Me: Shorty… I couldn’t help but eavesdrop on the couple sitting next to us at the ramen place.

Shorty: Haha yah why?

Me: It looked like they were on a date. And the guy was like going on and on and on about cars. VW and BMWs and Audis etc etc… the expression on the girl’s face looked like “Let me die… just let me die now”.

Shorty: Hahahaha…

Me: But I know how he feels. Sometimes when you’re with normal people you feel like James Bond. But when you’re with the girl you like you feel like Dumb and Dumber and you start acting not yourself.

Shorty: No… you were quite charming and smooth when you first courted me what.

Me: Maybe by then I had already sharpened my skills….

Shorty: Either that.. or you didn’t like me that much.

#243

Shorty and I are in her room at her hospital. I’m reading the news for her about the shooting of the banker yesterday. (Original article here)

Me: *reads excerpt from article* “A waiter at one of the stalls said he was serving customers at about 1.50pm when the shooting occurred. ‘I did not hear any loud sound or notice anything unusual. I was busy serving our usual lunch-hour crowd,’said the 45-year-old, who realised there had been a shooting only when police cars drove up with their sirens on.”

Shorty: Haha….

Me: Yes… I’m not sure why they added in that ‘statement’ since he didn’t really witness anything or add any value to the article.

Shorty: Ya they could have quoted anyone.

Me: Yah…they could have gotten a statement from you. “Audrey Ooi was sleeping on her hospital bed during the time of the shooting. She did not hear any sound or notice anything unusual. She said “I was just sleeping”. She only realised there was a shooting when her husband told her about it later on.”

Shorty: HAHAHA

#244

I’m sitting by Shorty’s bedside on my laptop while she sleeps. She suddenly wakes up and wipes her pillow of drool….

Me: *stares*

Shorty: *stares back with one semi-opened eye*

Me: Drooling huh this girl.

Shorty: Oh heh… was hoping you didn’t see that.

#245

Shorty’s medical condition is such: The only cure for her increasing high blood pressure is to deliver Fighter. But Fighter is only at 29 weeks and if we deliver him too early he could have complications. So what the doctor is trying to do is to control Shorty’s blood pressure as much as possible so that she can keep Fighter inside her womb longer. Each week longer that Fighter stays in there is a better chance for him to come out a fully healthy baby. So anyway yesterday we were having a conversation.

Shorty: I’m worried about Fighter. Sad that my body can’t keep him in for the full 40 weeks and have to deliver him prematurely.

Me: There there Shorty. You’ve already done an amazing job. You created Fighter out of nothing in your womb and carried him long enough for him to have a good chance of survival even if he has to be delivered early. I think that’s already pretty amazing

Shorty: Well you contributed your sperm.

Me: Hahaa yes I did. A very fine specimen indeed. In any case, you give him as much time as you can to let him grow in your womb. After that it’s his turn to take over and fight to be a healthy baby. We will give him the best medical support we can get to help him through this.

Shorty: *touches tummy* I hope he stays in there longer.

The past two days have been rough. On Wednesday Shorty went to see the Doctor for a routine check-up on Fighter. It was the first check-up that I wasn’t able to have with her because Angela wanted to go see Fighter on the ultrasound and the only day both she and the Doctor could make it was Wednesday. That happened to be the day I couldn’t make it because I had a meeting.

Just when my meeting started, I saw some messages Shorty had sent me. I immediately stepped out to call her back and learned that she had high blood pressure and the doctor suspected she had a medical condition called preeclampsia. Preeclampsia is when the mother gets high blood pressure and the only way to cure it is to deliver the baby. Fighter however is only at 28 weeks, too early to be developed. So what the Doctor has to do is try to delay the delivery as long as she can. Each week we delay it is a higher chance for Fighter to come out a healthy baby.

So anyway these are a few conversations we had during these few rough days.

#239 

Shorty is on the hospital bed with her food tray in front of her. The food has been there untouched for like 15 minutes or so. By the time Shorty decides to eat it….

Shorty: The food is cold already.

Me: Hmmm….

Shorty: You think I can ask them to heat it up again?

Me: Yeah sure.

Shorty: *presses button to call nurse*

The nurse walks in

Shorty: Hi do you think you can heat this up for me?

Nurse: Sure.

5 minutes later the nurse returns with the food.

Shorty: *starts eating*….. Fatty….

Me: Ya?

Shorty: Do you know when I said to heat up the food?

Me: Yeah?

Shorty: Well… they heated up the watermelon too.

Me: Eww… how does it taste?

Shorty: Weird. Wanna try?

Me: Not really.

#240

While in the hospital room.

Me: *farts*

Shorty: WOW… DAMN SMELLLYY!!

Me: Hehehehhe

Shorty: Fuck lahh….

Me: Do you think my fart increases or reduces your blood pressure?

Shorty: INCREASES LAH!

#241

Me: My mom scolded me today. She said we shouldn’t call our baby Fighter. See… now he really has to fight.

Shorty: Then call him what? Ah Weak ah? That’s what my family calls my brother.

#242

A few hours after Shorty was discharged from the hospital, she had to be readmitted into the hospital because of high blood pressure one night. While we were in the emergency room the nurse put a needle through the vein in her hand to allow for a drip. Shorty hates that not just because it hurts but because it’s uncomfortable. I hold Shorty hands tightly while she turns her face to look away from the needle.

Shorty: I’m sorry.

Me: What are you sorry for?

Shorty: I’m sorry I’m such a burden. *tears*

Me: You’re not a burden. Remember what I said at our wedding? Life is an adventure. We will have good adventures and bad adventures… this just happened to be a bad or difficult one.

Shorty: Yes but I just never thought things will turn so bad in just our first year.

Me: What do you mean things turn bad? What has turned bad? Nothing. We’re just having a bit of a bump on the road but that’s it. We are in this emergency room, we’ve got the best doctor in KL and I am here with you throughout. Our relationship is as strong as ever and if we get through this we’ll just get stronger. It’s not like our relationship started breaking down under this pressure.

Shorty: I guess.

Me: This isn’t the only difficult time we’re going to face. We’re going to have other tough times too. But the good news is that we’ll have lots of good times too.

Shorty: *sigh*

Me: I love you Shorty. I made a vow to be there for you always and here I am, and here I will always be.

Shorty: A few days time it’ll be our first wedding anniversary. I guess we might have to spend it in the hospital.

Me: Well we’ll decorate the hospital room up or something. We’ll think of a way to have fun 🙂

#238

Shorty:  Fatty… you were snoring last night?

Me: Was I? I thought I seldom snore.

Shorty: You were last night.

Me: I must’ve been really tired.

Shorty: Maybe. Did you feel me tickle you?

Me: You what?

Shorty: HAHAHA

Me: You tickled me?

Shorty: Yala… you were snoring so loud I couldn’t sleep. So I tickled you.

Me: And did I stop snoring?

Shorty: Not at first. So I tickled you harder.

Me: ….

Shorty: Then you stopped.

#235

So Shorty and I have finally been buying baby stuff in preparation for Fighter. Baby stuff as I now learn is very very expensive. One of the things we need for example is a breast pump that pumps out breast milk for the baby.

#236

Me: You know what… I really hope Maximus doesn’t have your genes when it comes to height.

Shorty: Why?

Me: Because if he’s short, people in school are just going to call him Minimus.

#237

Me: Ok Shorty. I finally thought about a Chinese name for Fighter already. So we can name him this instead of Maximus and it will still retain the meaning of Fighter.

Shorty: What?

Me: And it’s a proper name la… not like Siu Phak or Tiuk Phak. Like people actually use this name. In fact it’s quite a common… well not common but well known name.

Shorty: What?

Me: And it really represents the meaning of Fighter…

Shorty: ….. is it….. Mulan?

Me: Are we going to be serious here or not?

Shorty: Ok fine….. What is it?

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

…

 

Me: I’m thinking. Fighter’s name can be… Jude Tiah Ip Man.

Shorty: People are just going to call him IP (Eye-pee) man. Hey Internet Protocol Man!