Something happened to me that really pissed me off today. I vented it all on my Dayre and had lots of comments there from other parents who struggle with the same thing.
So I decided to blog about it here as sort of a public service announcement so everyone will spread the word and tell other people WHAT NOT TO DO when you see another person’s cute baby in a mall or restaurant.
This is the story from my Dayre.
Here’s what happened. I was having lunch at this restaurant with @fourfeetnine@fightertiah and @wilson.
When we arrived the waiter asked if we needed a baby chair. I said yes please then took a seat.
I was sitting down with Fighter standing on my lap facing me. We were playing around and I was enjoying the moment when suddenly from the corner of my eyes I saw a set of hands coming through towards Fighter.
I looked up to see the waiter extending his hands out to carry Fighter.
I was like WTF but I didn’t know how to react. On one hand I wanted to tell him off and say “wtf do you think you’re doing ? I don’t know you. Hands off my son!”.
But I was torn. He didn’t mean any harm I’m sure (unlike assholes who try to cut line who obviously do), he just wanted to play with Fighter.
So I tried to stop him nicely by saying “Fighter doesn’t like other people to carry him” but he ignored it and went ahead.
The truth is Fighter is a friendly baby.
“He happily lets almost anyone carry him. ”
So he took Fighter in his arms and played with him for a while. Then sat Fighter down in his baby seat.
I was pissed. But I didn’t show it because I was torn. On one hand I’m like WTF! I mean if the waiter wanted to see my phone that I placed on the table, he wouldn’t have touched it without my permission right ?
So why would you go ahead and carry or touch my baby without asking me ?!?
ARRGGHHHH I WRITE ALSO ANGRY. IM TAPPING SO FUKIN HARD ON MY SCREEN ITS GONNA CRACK!
Plus I don’t know him. I don’t know if his hands were clean or he was having a cold that could pass on to Fighter.
On the other hand … Again. He probably meant no harm.
So I don’t know. The next time somebody touches my baby should I just say “HANDS OFF THE BABY ASSHOLE!!” And risk being perceived as rude myself…. Or just suffer in silence like I did this time round
So that’s my experience.
Other parents left comments and shared their own stories and there were lots of other stories. But the one which took the cake was THIS ONE.
I totally feel you @timothytiah…it happened to me once when I was out having a meal. But it was a lady from another table that came to carry my girl. Like how friendly Fighter is, my girl happily lift up her arms. AND THAT LADY BROUGHT MY GIRL BACK TO HER TABLE TMD. I was too shocked and caught off guard to even speak but I immediately followed her and took back my girl wtf. She never even asked if she could, she never even looked at me and fucking just carried my girl away. First and last time, ever.
I mean seriously… WTF?!!?!?!?
So if you’re somone who touches (or worse carry or kiss) random kids in public, let me just say please stop doing it. Why?
1) It’s MANNERS
If I was holding a phone and you, someone I didn’t know wanted to see it… would you just grab it from my hand and have your way? No right? Because it’s just bad manners.Then why would you do the same thing on someone else’s baby?
2) We don’t know where your hands have been!
It’s not because your hands are necessarily dirty all the time. But here’s the thing. Parents of young babies are paranoid of whatever germs, viruses or bacteria that can be passed on to our kids. Yes… sometimes we’re so paranoid it’s almost unjustifiable but bear with us. They’re kids.
3) Babies get sick easier than you think and a sick baby is torture not just for the baby but for the parents too
I once had just ONE person who had a flu carry Fighter for a while. She didn’t declare that she was sick. A few days later Fighter caught the same flu virus and a nightmare followed. Fighter kept crying because he wasn’t feeling well… and he couldn’t sleep so he cried even more. We had to constantly check him many times a day for a fever and we would even wake up in the middle of the night to check on him to make sure his temperature wasn’t too high. It was a stressful, sleepless few days for us.
Fighter suffered and so did my wife and I. So please… that 5 minutes of holding a baby while you’re sick, is days of suffering for the baby and his/her parents.
If you want to read many more horror stories from parents, you can check out the comments on my Dayre.
Please share or tell everyone you know to stop doing this!
Timothy Tiah – Co-Founder of Colony, Kuala Lumpur Co-Working Space